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So, I don't get it...

Posted: Wed Dec 10, 2003 10:49 pm
by N++
How do I turn my computer on? I mean, I come here everyday and my computer is already on. If my computer crashed, how would I fix it? I usually leave that up to IT. I'm kind of worried with all these virus things around now a days, I don't want to lose all my "technical documents" if you know what I mean ;) ;)

I mean, this is kind of embarrassing :oops: since I've been using computers for over 14 years, but I've always wanted to know. Well, I've finally gotten the guts to ask and I know all those here at the HaloMods forums will support my quest for knowledge.

Thanks again everybody in advance for the help!

N++

Posted: Wed Dec 10, 2003 10:52 pm
by Donny
what?! come on, N-...we arent supposed to be doin those kinds of things to machinery. save them for when you grow up and get a woman ;)

Posted: Wed Dec 10, 2003 10:55 pm
by giantnewb
ok yes, this is probably the most technical part of a computer..i lost a finger..and a ..well anyways. BE VERY CAREFUL. I AM NOT RESPONSIBLE IF YOU COMPUTER IS BROKE! follow these instructions step by STEP i dont want you whining to me when you accidenly hit the self destruct or the get run over by landrover button. ok im going to say this once, so listen well. you ready this might take awhile and i need your undying attention!

press the big green button


:shock: YOU CATCH ALL THAT

Posted: Wed Dec 10, 2003 10:58 pm
by N++
Erm ... my computer is ... light red.

What do I do now? There is no green button.

N++

Posted: Wed Dec 10, 2003 11:01 pm
by giantnewb
uh oh you got the red light this gets a little more complicated..you see red in certain parts of the world means turn into large killing animal..so logically thats what the red button does. so what your going to have to do, is wear green tinted sun glasses and press the button.

Posted: Wed Dec 10, 2003 11:02 pm
by Donny
ok, you have to pay attention to what kind of woma.....computer you are using. now, the position and size varies from computer to computer. my suggestion would be to push random areas until you get some sort of reaction from the wo....computer...dammit!

Posted: Wed Dec 10, 2003 11:03 pm
by N++
No, no. My computer is, you know, light red. Like, the case and all. I guess some color blind people may call it pink, but, it's really just light red. I do not, however, have a red light.

Try again :(

Posted: Wed Dec 10, 2003 11:04 pm
by giantnewb
but what about the eye socket...er i mean the power cord you dont want to electricuit yourself!

Posted: Wed Dec 10, 2003 11:05 pm
by N++
Donny wrote:ok, you have to pay attention to what kind of woma.....computer you are using. now, the position and size varies from computer to computer. my suggestion would be to push random areas until you get some sort of reaction from the wo....computer...dammit!
GIANTNewb wrote:but what about the eye socket...er i mean the power cord you dont want to electricuit yourself!
Please do not joke around, I thought you people would be sensative to my needs, not make fun of me. If you are not going to give me a serious answer, do not reply at all.

Thanks.

Posted: Wed Dec 10, 2003 11:07 pm
by giantnewb
alright i see what your saying its like the feucha game boy advanced..(its the only one they had left i swear!) well i would also recomend the get a long stick and start poking it method, i recomend a wooden broom stick.

Posted: Wed Dec 10, 2003 11:08 pm
by Donny
im thenthitive to you needths </giantNEWB voice> Ram you head into your light red *cough*pink*cough* case....and hope it will turn on for you. my best advice

Posted: Wed Dec 10, 2003 11:09 pm
by SourceGuy
I bet MonoxideC or some other dev will be happy to write some program that can turn your PC on. They have nothing to do anyways.

Posted: Wed Dec 10, 2003 11:12 pm
by giantnewb
maybe they will also build him a robot to turn the computer on and off. it also is going to need some cool green tinted sun glasses.

Posted: Wed Dec 10, 2003 11:18 pm
by N++
Guys, please stop playing around. I'm getting ready to go to bed and I don't want to have another sleepless night wondering what'll happen if my computer shuts itself off. I've not slept in years because of this. I would like to get this all sorted out right here and right now!

Thanks again,
N++

Posted: Wed Dec 10, 2003 11:23 pm
by giantnewb
well i stil highly reccomend the broomstick tactic but if that doesnt float your boat there is always the cavemen tactic that invlovle a club..thats more risky. also theres the send my sibling in to press the big mysterious button strategy. or the leave your animal in the room and hope they bump the button...and theres the new experimental turn your computer on strategy its called...press the button on the front of the tower..but i think thats just crazy talk.

Posted: Wed Dec 10, 2003 11:23 pm
by Aztec
whats a button?

Posted: Wed Dec 10, 2003 11:27 pm
by giantnewb
ahh the button yes it was originated on easter island where the first pc's where built and they wore them on the heads. it was kind of like virtual reality..they where very big pc's and shaped like a head so that teachers wouldnt notice! well somewhere along the line they made it so you can button up your shirt with button (the big circle things) and than they made shirts...so a button is..anything circle..and kinda big..well sometimes small..and medium and meduim small...

Posted: Wed Dec 10, 2003 11:27 pm
by Donny
MY COMPUTER WEARS NO PANTS..................ahem *cough*...damn!

Posted: Wed Dec 10, 2003 11:30 pm
by giantnewb
PAnts?!?! you mean You leave YOUR CD trey OPEN!! dont even get me started in the dangers in that!

Posted: Wed Dec 10, 2003 11:30 pm
by giantnewb
woops double post ill jsut insult you in binary

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